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JEAN SHEPHERD & Army Slang

My SHEP’S ARMY contains two stories in which Shepherd refers to army slang: “Army Phraseology” and “Casual Company Education,” suggesting that some of it could not be said on the air. In the book’s appendix, linked to those two stories, I give some mentionable and unmentionable terms I could find on the Internet.

I’m ever grateful for proffered info from what one could refer to as “Shep’s Spies.” Shepherd enthusiast Joel Baumwoll, on the Facebook group “I’m a fan of Jean Shepherd” led me to the Internet page: The Palm Beach Post  of October 20, 1941, featuring an article by John Ferris titled “Military Slang Of 1941 Makes Things Different.”  Although none of the slang terms are unprintable, they add amusing info regarding words probably familiar to Shepherd while in the army. I mainly limit this list to food-related terms, as Shepherd had focused on them in “Army Phraseology.”

KP conscript                       pearl diver

KP dishwasher                  bubble dancer

Coffee                                  battery acid, bootleg, blackstrap, ink, java

Ketchup                               blood

Beef                                      canned willie, tiger meat

White fish                           sewer trout

Chicken and turkey         buzzard meat

Canned milk                       armored car [typo? should this be “armored cow”?]

Bread                                    punk

Rolling kitchen                   bean gun

Commissary officer         beans

Prunes                                  strawberries

Solid matter in soup        bug

Hash                                      slum gullion

Cook                                      slum burner

Mess sergeant                  belly robber

 Cold cuts                            horse meat [navy term, but also army as well?]

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Non-food terms too good to omit:

Letter from girlfriend     sugar report

Letter in reply                            behavior report

Reportedly a navy expression, but maybe army also?:

Changing underwear without taking a shower is referred to

as “taking an electric light bath.”

__________________________

No wonder that Shepherd, lover of words, enjoyed such slang!

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JEAN SHEPHERD–Where’s the dialog?

Everyone who has had any contact with me–personally, through my books, through my emails, through this blog–must know what a strong enthusiast of Jean Shepherd’s work I am. So why is it, that at times, I get so disappointed?

eb face graphic

Why? In relation to what I believe are tens of thousands of Shepherd fans still alive and being born and converted to the cause, why are there still: not enough book reviews and sales? not enough visitors to this blog? not enough general discussion and even controversy regarding Shepherd’s life and work through the blog, emails, and Facebook pages devoted to him? Yup. All that.

Here’s a bit of what I wrote on the home page’s “ABOUT” part of this SHEPQUEST blog:

“I encourage everyone to submit ideas, information, and questions to this blog

so we can all learn by participating

in open discussions regarding every aspect

of Shepherd’s creative world.”

Where are the ideas, information, and questions? I’m grateful for the few Shep fans, such as Joel Baumwoll, who sometimes respond with comments.  Regarding my post about Shep maintaining his comic take on the world around him,

Joel wrote:

“This aspect of Shep’s work had a huge influence on me from the age of 15, to now (73).  He taught me to see the world as a giant circus, with humor in so much of it.  This has sustained me and given me the ability to enjoy the most mundane experiences, like riding on a bus and watching and listening to people around me.  I am grateful to Shep for this gift.”

I responded:

“I like your comment. I just remembered a ‘Calvin and Hobbes’ cartoon strip panel I’ve been saving for many years. Hobbes, the toy tiger, says to Calvin, ‘I suppose if we couldn’t laugh at things that don’t make sense, we couldn’t react to a lot of life.’ ”

YES.

Little things like these interactions,

plus my tenacity, pure pleasure I get out of it,

and the strong superego instilled in me by my parents,

keep me invigorated and keep me plunging ahead

with my trusty EXCELSIOR banner held high.

Shel's excelsior drawing

(Part of Shel Silverstein’s drawing for Shep’s LP

“Jean Shepherd and other Foibles.”)

______________________________

Gang, what got me started on this? The other day, being the self-centered egotist that I am, I checked out (not for the first time, as one might imagine) the Customer Reviews of SHEP’S ARMY on http://www.amazon.com. As I encountered a reader’s statement I saw was inaccurate, I responded. Several comments volleyed back and forth across the net. What follows is  the reader’s review followed by some further comments. The reader calls himself “Phred.” Phred is unknown to me–he is a listener and a reader.

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PHRED’s REVIEW

Enter the storyteller. It is his job to remember not merely great events or funny punchlines; but also to make real the common events that remind the old and illuminate for the young what the business of living is about. This is the role that Jean Shepherd took up and in which he excelled. Most people met Jean Shepherd via his very successful movie Christmas Story A Christmas Story . The movie is drawn from several of his published short stories and is narrated by Jean AKA “Shep”.

I had first come to know of Jean Shepherd either through his brief television show Jean Shepherd’s America or the WOR New York portion of his radio days. His was a time when talk radio did not have to be shock jock or political storm and thunder. The great skill of Jean Shepherd both in his published works and in his live radio broadcasts was not merely that he placed you into a world you may not have known but you share his passion for that world.

Shep’s Army is a set of transcripts from Jean Shepherd’s radio shows focused on his Army experiences in World War II. He served as an enlisted man about as far from the fighting front as anyone stationed in America could be. Transcript editor Eugene B. Bergmann writes the introduction Shep’s stories are not to be read as strictly autobiography. Even so the apparent confusion over whether Shepherd served in the Army Signal Corps or the occasionally mentioned `mess kit repair company’ is clearly confusion on the editors part. Anyone with direct military experience would recognize that the mess kit repair company was an inside joke invented by someone in his company to cut off the repetitive questions civilians might ask of a Signal Corps Radar operator.

In roughly 30 stories Shep relates the boredom, the largely unwanted alternatives to boredom and the arbitrary existence of a war time EM (enlisted man). Because these were radio broadcasts he works hard to avoid the authentic crude language of that life. Even so you come to feel the cold and the tension of his experience.
Shep’s Army is not humor. It can be funny, it is also disconcerting. The two things come across consistently . Firstly, how completely different being in uniform is from being out. Secondly, Shep’s loneliness. Nowhere in here is the talk of instant, lifelong comradeship. This is not the stuff of typical military hijinks that might lampoon his disordered experiences. This is the panoply of human reactions to a highly ordered life that was meant to prepare you for unexpected events.

Shep’s Army allows you to experience the humorous and the ordinary. Lighter stories tend to be highly detailed and explained. Tragic and near tragic events tend to be more simply described, allowing you to see them in stark contrast. This is good story telling. These are the honest tales of an observant story teller.

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COMMENTS POSTED REGARDING THE REVIEW

Thank you, Phred, for the thoughtful description of Shepherd’s army stories as I transcribe and edit them in this book. In my introduction, I note that Shepherd “sometimes claimed to have been in a mess kit repair company, whose insignia was mess kits with crossed forks on a background of SOS. (Anyone needing a definition of SOS should ask a soldier about creamed chipped beef on toast.)” I state this in a totally straightforward fashion in what I assumed could be clearly understood by the reader (as it must have been by Shep’s listeners), as an obvious joke on Shepherd’s part. Phred comments that, “the apparent confusion over whether Shepherd served in the Army Signal Corps or the occasionally mentioned `mess kit repair company’ is clearly confusion on the editors part.” I am not at all confused. Maybe the description of “mess kits with crossed forks on a background of SOS” is not, by itself, as obviously humorous and absurd a mental image as Shep or I understood it to be. I had thought that my parenthetical comment that one should ask a soldier about creamed chipped beef on toast would slyly and sufficiently underscore Shepherd’s joke. My bad!
Again, thank you for extensive comments on the book.      EXCELSIOR! Eugene B. Bergmann
Phred says:

Thank you for taking the time to explain . Perhaps between us the joke will be understood by all.
I look froward to reading more of the newly published transcriptions of Jean Shepherd’s radio broadcasts.
As for reading even more published transcription than one finds in SHEP’S ARMY, I have more similar manuscripts of Shep broadcasts ready to go–all I need is a publisher’s OK. [This means that I am looking for a publishing contract.] In the meantime, for those not aware of my previous book, see its nearly 500 pages of description and appreciation of Shepherd’s creative world, with many interviews and illustrations:Excelsior, You Fathead!: The Art and Enigma of Jean Shepherd. Cheers!
Phred says:

FYI
There is a lot of experience that suggests that dialog between a reviewer and a writer,or in your case an editor is fraught with the most likely outcome being tears.Luckily we both share a respect for and a certain nostalgia for Jean Sheppard. To the degree one can rely on memory, there are a number of Jean Shepherd collections beyond the two or three others I have read. My reading list is long but thanks to you I am more likly to get back to JS soon. From your remarks, I am guessing that there exists nothing like a true JS biography(?) Some one out there is missing the chance to travel the heartland of America to gather the documents and interview the few remaining who can remember. JS cared for lots of what America was like as the “Great Generation” crossed the digital divide. I suspect he had little patience for the first term and had a love hate relationship with the later. Likewise I suspect he had fierce political opinions and little tolerance for a politics of no middle ground. Anyway thank you for sharing in such a positive and helpful manner.

True, there is no actual Jean Shepherd biography. My EXCELSIOR, YOU FATHEAD! is frequently described as such, but to my mind that book is a description and appreciation of Shep’s creative work. (See page 14 of that book for my statement regarding this.)
As for a straightforward biography, I don’t believe a comprehensive one could ever have been done, and I don’t believe it would have much of interest to say beyond the great creative life he had. (Shepherd did a very good job in hiding and distorting the straight biographical facts of his life.)
On the other hand, a documentary film maker is indeed doing extensive interviewing these days in order to preserve good material about Shepherd for all of us who would enjoy additional biographical material. I help him in whatever way I can, and I hope he will produce a work that will measure up to his dreams! FYI: For more of my thoughts and info on Shep, see my blog, which I’ve now posted on over 70 times since February–http://www.shepquest.wordpress.com
Tom McGee says:

Excellent review, it was thoughtful, clear, informative and helpful. Great job! You have my vote! Tom
AC says:

Phred,What a fantastic (and fascinating) review (and what a treat to have such a terrific exchange in the Comments section — and with the Editor, no less!)…Thank you for introducing me to someone whose work I was unfamiliar with, and now look forward to exploring (and enjoying).Thank you so much…
_____________________
Oh yes!
My spirit jumps for joy at these humble exchanges.
I hope our Shep’s spirit also responds.
Shep-HowardJ.'s
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JEAN SHEPHERD: Shep’s PUBLISHERS WEEKLY

What follows is the Publishers Weekly on-line review of the book. One could not hope for a better review! I’m very pleased and proud regarding the comments made in the review. By my inter-line comments I’m just attempting to explain a bit more that a reviewer could not fit into length constraints, and to expand more of what I hope my”editing” contributes to the whole.  [Bracketed comments in bold are mine.]
_____________________________________________________________
3440561v2v1
Shep’s Army: Bummers, Blisters, & Boondoggles 
Jean Shepherd, edited by Eugene B. Bergmann. Opus (Hal Leonard, dist.),
$14.95 trade paper (256p) ISBN 978-1-62316-012-8
Editor Bergmann attempts with much success [Thank you, reviewer.] to simulate a posthumous memoir of author, comedian, and radio personality Jean Shepherd’s army years. [I refer to the book not as a memoir–which it certainly is also–but as short stories arranged into a rough chronological sequence that works in a way that approximates a coming-of-age-novel of Shepherd’s army experiences.  In my organization of Shep’s army stories, the first part, called YOU’RE IN THE ARMY NOW, Shepherd is in a sense born into this strange military existence. The Camp Crowder Part is his childhood education into the army’s Signal Corps. In that regard, note the comment by Shep in the book’s story, “Service Club Virtuoso.” He says, “…you never completely expunge the roots of your childhood–which I spent in Camp Crowder.” Utilizing years of broadcasts and taking advantage of multiple retellings of the same events, Bergmann has assembled a surprisingly unified and confident account of oppressive years spent in the army’s Signal Corps from 1942 to 1944, with factual commentary between chapters providing context. [My commentaries between Parts do indeed provide context in a way that I hope emphasizes the book’s organized “Parts” into 1) Initiation–birth– into the army world;   2) early education–childhood in Camp Crowder;   3) Post-early-education-skills–radar knowledge and other adult abilities used in Florida’s Camp Murphy environs;   4) Additional experiences typical of soldier-life in the military and then final army days in which he can observe it all with a kind of educated, adult perspective–such as  a more objective and even sympathetic  view of the enemy–as POWs;   5) Remembering it all as a civilian, in a kind of “retirement” from it: “Thank God I ain’t in the army!”]  Shepherd was never shipped to a warzone; thus the incidents recounted mostly concern the accommodations at a series of stateside camps, the cruelty of the fellow soldiers, and the sometimes Kafka-esque bureaucracy. His service was not without the defiance of death, and seems to have damaged both Shepherd and his compatriots; the pessimistic tone may surprise fans. [There may indeed be a pessimistic tone in some sections, but Shep’s humorous take on most everything is also one of the book’s constants.] The collection is otherwise a compliment to Shepherd’s usual storytelling and the exaggerated melodrama of his signature narration style, with a number of laugh-out-loud moments in a presentation that, against the odds, captures the energy of an oral telling. [Thank you for that, reviewer. I do believe that I’ve kept close to Shep’s own oral presentation with the help of such mechanics on my part as knowing where best to provide sentence stops, exclamation marks, ellipses,  and other useful paraphernalia that assist the reader, who unavoidably lacks Shep’s masterful oral delivery. The back of the book, however, does include references on how to find Shepherd’s spoken stories transcribed in the book.]
_________________________________________________________________
Again, thank you, reviewer, for your acute perceptions and kinds words.
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JEAN SHEPHERD and KEITH OLBERMANN–and sports

26OLBERMANN-articleLarge

                                                                         New York Times 8/26/2013

Olbermann Set to Return to ESPN and Sports News

____________________________

So Keith Olbermann is back as a sports guy. I’ll miss his political commentary, but I’m glad he’s overcome whatever he’s overcome.

There are several connections between Olbermann and Shepherd. Olbermann is a Jean Shepherd fan who over the years, on his sports programs and his political commentary programs has given tributes to Shepherd.

On the internet I’ve found several transcripts of his sports programs in which he has expressed his admiration for Shep:

<The immortal humorist and sometimes Chicagoan Jean Shepherd put it best:>

On Countdown Olbermann said, “Well, we had some doozies in this 21st week of 2005, more examples what the late, great Jean Shepherd used to call ‘creeping meatballism.'”

For a period on his Countdown MSNBC television program, he alternated his signoff between Edward R. Morrow’s “Good night and good luck” and Shepherd’s “Keep your knees loose.” When he changed to the unaltering “Good night and good luck,” he kept a reference to Shepherd with the faint-but-discernable Shepherd theme song, “Bahn Frei” playing nightly under brief video-clip segments of ridiculous human foibles.

When the “A Christmas Story House” opened, Olbermann interviewed the owner, mentioning Shepherd.

When the director of A Christmas Story, Bob Clark, died, Olbermann did a commentary.

He wrote the foreword to my Shep’s Army: Bummers, Blisters, and Boondoggles, indicating that he has been a Shepherd fan since his youth.

obermann knees crossed

Shepherd and Olbermann have a long history together

–and that includes their mutual interest in sports.

(Here’s where I segue into Jean Shepherd-and-sports.)

Shepherd played football in high school. As he was a ham radio operator at this young age, he was given the job of commenting on high school sports for a local radio station.

Shepherd claimed that as a young broadcaster he did radio commentary for part of a season for the “Toledo Mudhens” baseball team. He often mentioned his baseball-playing days as a kid. He also claimed that he played third base for “The United Brethren” team.  The guys were hired to play for the church. In the video drama, “Phantom of the Open Hearth,” in a game against  “Immaculate Conception.” Ralphie is seen playing third base. In one of his radio stories, Shepherd talks about soldiers carving out a baseball field in Florida’s jungle, and, it being so hot, they played in the nude. It’s said that Jean Shepherd played professional ball, but this may not be so–his brother Randy, it’s reported, pitched for a minor league farm team and maybe played in spring training in the Majors.

During the year of the “Miracle Mets,” Shepherd did a couple of enthusiastic broadcasts about them. Shepherd made the quasi-documentary video for Major League Baseball about the favorite team of his youth the “Chicago White Sox.” He told several stories on his broadcasts about his father, in the stands, razzing Yankee players.  During a World Series, for its first satellite broadcasts, he did short commentaries for the Armed Forces Radio Network.

Will Keith Olbermann comment again

on his enthusiasm for Jean Shepherd?

Let’s hope so, sports-fans/Shep-fans.

olbermann smiling

Keith Olbermann, Shep-fan.

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JEAN SHEPHERD and truth, army style

What’s true and what’s fiction or even fantasy have always been a major component regarding how we interpret Jean Shepherd and how he regards his own attitude toward truth and fiction. And this is true in all his stories, including those about the army. In the introduction to Shep’s Army: Bummers, Blisters, and Boondoggles, my book of Shepherd’s army stories, I quote him from one of his broadcasts: “You continually see stories and movies and plays about the army, but I can tell you, I have never seen anything that even remotely resembles the real army.” Shepherd more than once has commented that much fiction he’s encounters is not true to real life. He continues the thought in an army story about a young corporal who “says beautiful things and writes poems, and he’s gonna have a little grocery store on Flatbush Avenue when he gets back. And you know he’s gonna get killed.” The suggestion is that this is a cliche that doesn’t actually happen in real life.

I’ve recently re-encountered another of Shep’s similar thoughts about being in the army. He comments that:

“Most people don’t know what they talk about in the barracks. You never see in army movies guys just sitting around–just sitting there rapping. Shooting the breeze. What do they talk about? Whenever you see a movie where they purport to be telling you what they talk about there’s always a scene where Donald O’Connor takes out his wallet and shows his girl’s picture to Van Johnson. You know, that kind of thing. I never once, in all the years I was in the army–and I was in longer than I care to even think about–I never once saw anybody whip out the picture of his girl and say, “Here, this is Emily.”

Yes, army movies and most movies about everything have traditionally been full of cliches. But Shepherd seems to imply that fiction should portray the minor, day-to-day matters such as waiting for your clothes to dry at the laundromat–the kinds of matters out of which he creates his humor. As Ron Simon, curator of Television and Radio at the Paley Center for Media wrote in connection with its Jerry Seinfeld tribute to Shepherd, “The late radio raconteur Jean Shepherd and the master of his domain, Jerry Seinfeld, are obsessed with the minutiae of daily life. Nothing is too small in the detritus of human existence for contemplation. For Shepherd and Seinfeld, meaning is not found in pondering the huge metaphysical questions that have perplexed Plato onward; life is discovered in the lint, that small detail that informs us who we really are.” As Simon notes, their peculiarity is in their comedic genius of encountering the significant in what most of us pass over as insignificant. What a marvelous turn of mind!

The problem with incorporating much of insignificance into “serious” fictional prose is that it tends to take up time and space where the creator is focusing on making every word and incident count–making them signify and be in some sense symbolic of the large issues he’s getting at. In a specific instance of Shepherd’s complaint, on one program, he criticizes Norman Mailer’s An American Dream  for inaccurately depicting American Life, as though it was meant to be a “realistic novel.” Not so–in fact, I’d describe An American Dream as depicting more of an American nightmare, a strong metaphor for neurotic fantasy. Much fiction is not a depiction of the events of “real life,” but constructs a truthful metaphor for what real life is like. The familiar problem, as I see it, is that there are different methods/strategies for arriving at different aspects of what is “truth,” and the proponent of his/her methods tends to be critical of differing paths through fictional woods.

3 shep images together 3 Sheps

mailer1 Mailer

As an enthusiast of the works of both Norman Mailer and Jean Shepherd, I’d say that, in their explorations of the America they love, they each take a different path–through different forested American landscapes.

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JEAN SHEPHERD and foul language Part 2

This is a short description of those instances in my transcribed Shep stories in SHEP’S ARMY, in which he refers to and doesn’t quite use foul language.

FOURTH OF JULY IN THE ARMY on page 79 he alludes to the word he wanted to use, but doesn’t: bull****.

ARMY PHRASEOLOGY in which he refers to and does not use the many off-color words commonly used by army personnel–for food, body parts, etc.  My glossary at the end of the book is specifically in reference to this chapter, based on the few words I was able to find on the internet–google, etc.: “GI obscenity is extremely rich and varied. And all the expressions have a basic underlying humor….I can think of a number of great expressions that the civilian has never heard in his life.”

SERVICE CLUB VIRTUOSO page 70-72, in which, in the beginning of the story he refers to the “universal word” that he, too picks up and consistently uses in the army: “They say that language forms people, and you can’t separate it. Well, if you’ve only got one word in your entire vocabulary, you are formed, boy. I turn around to those guys waiting for the sink and I holler my favorite word, Flawaawaawaa! And they holler their favorite word back.”

CASUAL COMPANY EDUCATION starting on page 149 in which he refers to being able now, in the army to express many things by the way he says the familiar two-word phrase common in the army: “f*** Y**”:  I had enriched my vocabulary tremendously. I had heard words used in ways that I did not imagine, before my entry into the army, could conceivably be used this way.”

_________________

I recommend that people check out these instances to appreciate how Shepherd can play around with circumlocutions, make his meaning perfectly clear, and get away with it!  This is fun!!!

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FYI

For those who would like to conveniently follow

Shepherd’s audios while reading the stories in

Shep’s Army,

Max Schmid of WBAI FM is compiling those audios along with other related

material,on a 2-CD set

 offered as premiums for membership.

(Note that my transcriptions into print

involve some minor-but-necessary adjustments,

but mostly, one can easily follow along.)

Shep's Army as CD set

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JEAN SHEPHERD Spoken & Written & Army Stories

The similarities and differences between what Shepherd spoke on the radio and what he submitted for print publication is a subject that arises from time to time. I’ve written about it and others have alluded to it in one way or another. I’ve written that Shepherd commented on a Long John Nebel show about someone saying that all he had to do was transcribe his radio stories: “Have you ever seen a tape transcribed? Well come on now.” He says it took him about ten or twelve years to get the feel of someone talking into his writing, and that as for just transcribing, “That is the last thing you can do.”

The New York Times reviewer comments that In God We Trust: All Others Pay Cash “is billed as a novel, but listeners to Jean Shepherd’s late nighttime radio show will not be fooled. They will recognize this as a switch of the oral memoir the author has been ad-libbing beautifully for around 10 years.”

The Village Voice reviewer of In God We Trust wrote “Relax, gang, this isn’t a novel after all. Or at least not a Novel novel, … It’s just old Shep telling a series of loosely related stories, each close to 45 minutes long, about childhood back in northern Indiana.” With that “45 minutes long” he may be suggesting that the stories are taken directly from the radio versions—not so!

V Voice IGWT reviewVillage Voice review (12/29/66)

(Book published in October,

review missed holiday shopping orgy.)

______________

In the foreword to my Shep’s Army, Keith Olbermann,  from what he remembers of an encounter over thirty years before, quotes Shepherd: “It’s just that I love the radio shows. But the books! I slave over the books! They have to be exactly right. Exactly!…” There is a possible implication here that the radio stories and the printed stories are different creations entirely, yet we know that almost all of the printed stories are transcribed, edited, and expanded versions of the same stories Shepherd told on the radio. (In Shep’s Army I’ve transcribed and edited, but not expanded, Shepherd radio stories.) By comparing what he said and what he published in print it’s easily seen that there are both great similarities and some differences in the basic story and in some details between Shep’s radio stories and the printed versions.

I’m not going to analyze a story in detail, but just give indications of some differences there can be between Shepherd’s spoken and written stories. Maybe the best-known previously published one is commonly called “Troop Train Ernie” and, among the times Shep told it, is in a Limelight broadcast of July 10, 1965. Then that or another spoken version of it was subsequently published in Shepherd’s 1981 A Fistful of Fig Newtons as ”The Marathon Run of Lonesome Ernie, the Arkansas Traveler.” I’ve chosen a part near the beginning of each and a part of each that forms the basic conclusion of each version, plus a studio version’s ending.

signal corps insignia

Brass Signal Corps Insignia

LIMELIGHT NEAR THE BEGINNING: Company K has been put on the alert. And we’re in this Midwestern camp. Fantastic camp. There must have been ten-hundred-thousand-million people in it. Barracks as far as the eyes could see. And they had a siding, came right into the middle of it with trains.

And every night we’re scared out of our skull. We could hear those trains leaving. You could hear companies marching past, you could hear the equipment rattling—they’re goin’! And now it is our turn. Company K is called to attention.

FIG NEWTONS NEAR THE BEGINNING: Without warning, Company K, our little band of nearsighted, solder-burned Radar “experts,” had been rousted out of the sack at three o’clock in the morning, two full hours before revile, given a quick short-arm, issued new carbines and combat field equipment, and had been told to fall out into the company street when Sergeant Kowalski blew his goddamn whistle. Stunned, we milled about under the yellow light bulbs of our icy barracks. Some laughed hysterically; others wept silently. A few hunched over their footlockers, using stubby pencils to make last-minute finishing touches to their wills.

_____________

LIMELIGHT NEAR THE ENDING: And suddenly it hit me. I can see right at this very minute, now, July 1965, there is a gaunt figure wearing a pair of archaic army shoes, World War II, battered, torn, his dog tags are worn to a mere nubbin, he’s got three cans of beer and he is hiding out in the woods, he’s afraid of the MPs. Have you ever heard about those Japanese who are out there on those islands? They don’t know the war is over. Do you know anything about Arkansas? I suspect that out there, in the darkness right now, my friend Ernie doesn’t know it’s over.

Ernie, wherever you are, are you aware, Ernie, that you were posthumously made a T/5? Ernie, you got back pay comin’.

A STUDIO RENDITION ENDING (February 14, 1963) And as far as I know, Ernie is still out there in Arkansas wearing those old brown shorts carrying his dog tags, hiding in the woods. He’s scared to come out. You don’t goof-off a troop train. You don’t get away with it like that. I don’t know what he did–you can’t go down to the police station and say, “I’m Ernie.” You’re walking around in your shorts, your dog tags, your GI shoes. I don’t know where Ernie is now. But it was all for the country. Ernie did it for all of us. I want you to know that. The stars and stripes forever. Hey, Ernie! Hey Ernie, I’m sorry, Ernie. You did your best, Ernie. I’ll tell you, Ernie, it’s our fault. We shoulda hollered. We felt it goin,’ Ernie. We just didn’t have the guts to do it. We didn’t have any guts! I’m sorry, Ernie. [Instead of Gasser as fellow KP grunt, this version costars Zinsmeister.]

FIG NEWTONS NEAR THE ENDING: There are times when I awake at 3 A.M. from a fitful sleep hearing the clink-clink-clink of poor Ernie’s dog tags. Ernie, lost forever in Arkansas, wearing only his GI underwear, forever AWOL, a fugitive from a sealed troop train. Is he out there yet, a haggard wraith living on berries and dead frogs? A fearful outcast? Does he know the war is over? That all wars are past?

The clink-clink-clink of Ernie’s dog tags says nothing.

dog tags

Dog Tags drawn by Jean Shepherd

near the beginning of

“Marathon Run of Lonesome Ernie,

the Arkansas Traveler”

 I can think of a way to clarify the issue, at least for some particular story that has appeared in both formats—first told on the air, then published in Playboy, then published in a Shepherd book.  But here’s the difficulty. For one thing, Shepherd may have told the story several times, such as the “Troop Train Ernie” story which he told in both the studio and at Limelight live broadcasts.  Each live version, being extemporized, would be a bit different (and who knows how many times he might have told it on programs of which no recordings have yet surfaced). And then the printed version would again be different.

Years ago, as a Norman Mailer enthusiast, I not only read his novel An American Dream, but thought it would be interesting to read the first published version as he wrote it for Esquire magazine, chapter by chapter under a monthly time restraint, as Dickens did for some of his books. How Mailer might have changed the text for book publication would be of literary interest to me in terms of style and content. I bought the dozen used issues on ebay.com and from other sources. But I finally decided that although this would be a great project for someone working toward a Masters in American Literature, the word-by-word studying and comparing the two versions would be more tedious work than I cared to expend. As one can imagine, despite my eagerness to know what the differences are and why the two versions are different in the Mailer work and in the Shepherd work, I can’t imagine myself doing the grinding, painstaking job necessary to find out. I figure at least a year or more, doing and thinking about nothing else.

The only things I know for sure are that Shepherd made the published versions longer and, in at least a couple  of them, he added obscene dialog for soldiers’ comments.

More about the obscenities to come.

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JEAN SHEPHERD’S ARMY induction to discharge

August 9, 2013, official publication day--SHEP’S ARMY

To begin my quest for putting together a book of Shepherd’s army tales, I first listed the army stories I could remember. Although I’ve heard virtually all the available broadcasts, I didn’t trust my faulty memory. I got out my small loose-leaf binders containing my printed-out flicklives.com posts documenting Max Schmid’s “Mass Backwards” weekly shows of Shepherd’s broadcasts, and went through the hundreds of descriptions, writing down the army story titles, original broadcast dates, and dates re-broadcast, knowing full well that, as the shows usually comprised multiple subjects, I’d miss some army tales because they had been a relatively minor item that week and hadn’t been noted down.

mass b pageLoose leaf printout of flicklives.com

Mass Backwards replay

for “Code School Story”

Then I went through the many hundreds of itunes.com titles (based on Jeff Beauchamp’s enormous collection of Shepherd shows he had accumulated onto CDs and distributed free). I listed all the army shows that seemed to be possibilities for the book (knowing that the person who originally titled the show might not have listed the army tale). I did the same for Max’s audio catalog of Shep shows.

I looked at them with the idea of finding some content-groupings, just in order to have some better picture of the massive list, and I discovered that indeed, simply for organizational purposes, there were a number logical groupings.

1) There were stories about Shep’s induction and first days in the army. They made up the first group.

2) A show that mentioned a train trip from those earliest days at Fort Sheridan, the Illinois recruitment center, to Camp Crowder, Missouri, where the inductees were to remain for a while—the subject of this first sad story in Part 2 is “Shermy the Wormy.” (By the way, when I listened to this one, I decided that it was too much of a downer and rejected it. Later I realized that it was too good to toss and I reinstated it as one of Shepherd’s best.) Other stories, full of humor and delightful commentary about Signal Corps training at Camp Crowder and its nearby town of Neosho, Missouri, fell into this early group.

Crowder pillow fringe

A sweet little Camp Crowder souvenir cushion.

3) Quite a few army stories described the semi-tropical environs where Shepherd spent a considerable time in a radar unit. Where was that center? I encountered a show in which Shep mentioned that GIs would go to a nearby city, West Palm Beach, Florida. I immediately employed google.com and discovered the now defunct radar training facility of Camp Murphy, just a short bus ride from West Palm Beach. Unquestionably the correct facility.

camp murphy marker

Where Camp Murphy (and Shep) used to be.

4) A number of Shepherd’s army stories did not involve any particular location or period, yet they were good stories, covering common GI experiences, so I knew there had to be a special section devoted to them. Among others, these include train rides, life in casual companies, payday, and an unforgettable story of Shep and another yardbird on KP plucking four-hundred dead chickens.

5) Finally, there was a group concerning his final days in the  army and his discharge. Naturally, at that point I was listening to a lot of all those army shows and making some decisions.

With these groupings, a light bulb went on over my head…

lightbulb

A light bulb just like this!

 and I realized that there was my organization and that Shepherd over the years, whether consciously or not , had scattered the makings of a “coming-of-age-in-the-army” epic.  I had the basis for my book. I then had to work out the details and describe the parts and explain why they constitute a sort of “Jean Shepherd Army Novel.” (Remember, it’s“sort of,” not necessarily “exactly.”)

Meanwhile, doing more thinking and research, I organized and wrote the book’s introduction. Also, just wondering one day about whether there was a significance to Shepherd always referring to his unit as “Company K,” I googled and encountered Company K, William March’s semi-autobiographical novel of World War I Marines, published in 1933.  Yes!  I’d bet that Shepherd’s company name was a tribute to the brutal and powerful March book. Of course I had to buy a copy, as close to a first edition as I could afford. Having read it and having read several astute essays on March and his book (his best-known work, also made into play and film, is The Bad Seed), the volume now nestles among my collection of Shep books and related material.

company k title

Title page of Company K by William March,

my first edition copy, third printing.

Transcribing the army stories demanded yellow lined pads and my blue and red Bic pens.  As I listened, paused the machine (tape or CD or itunes player) and reset the counter to capture any words I’d missed, I also began to make some decisions regarding what to keep and what kind of verbiage simply needed redoing or at least adjusting for print. For example, changing tense several times within a sentence works for Shepherd’s free- flowing voice, extemporizing on the wing—one doesn’t even notice— but can be disruptive on the printed page. It should be understood that my transcriptions are very faithful to Shep, with little changed and nothing added. One can basically read along from the book while listening to an audio of Shep telling his tale.

Further discussion to come

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JEAN SHEPHERD–Shep’s Army–visual indicators


sheps army final cover      back cover

Front and Back Covers of the Book

(click on images for larger views)

_________________________________________________

signal corps insignia

Official Signal Corps Insignia–Semaphore Flags

Shepherd spent his entire military career in the Signal Corps

___________________________________________________

PART 1 “You’re In the Army Now”

U.S. pin

The U. S. Army Pin For Formal Wear

Shepherd wore this pin when in dress uniform

_________________________________________________

Part 2 “Army Hospitality”

camp crowder postcard

Camp Crowder, Missouri Postcard

(Location of Shep’s early Signal Corps training)

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Part 3 “Wartime in Florida is Hell”

scr268

Early Radar Aparatus

(Type of radar  first used by Shepherd in Fort Murphy, Florida)

____

T/5

t.5 patch

T/5 Patch–Jean Shepherd’s Highest Rank

(See Shepherd’s comment on it in Shep’s Army.)

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Part 4 “An Army Education: Independent Study”

–Including Experience in a Separation Center–

ruptured duck 5.21.13

 “Ruptured Duck”

(Symbol of Honorable Discharge.

Available as metal pin or cloth patch)

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Part 5 “Mustered Out at Last”

Army Record

Jean Shepherd’s Discharge Record

(Pay no attention to the 10/01/99 date of death. Some stupid lapse in

bureaucratic record keeping in many organizations automatically

lists first of the month. It should say 10/16/99.)

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More to Come

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JEAN SHEPHERD’S army book–what I did


sheps army final cover

Jean Shepherd told loads of army stories over his decades of radio work, but he only wrote and published a couple of them. My Shep’s Army presents nearly three dozen Shepherd army stories never before in print.

As Shep’s Army book approaches publication, I feel that, regarding my role as “editor,” some amplification is needed (maybe mostly needed for myself) so that it’s clear what I have done and why I did it and what I have not done.  So you’ll see that to some extent this essay is both an explanation and a patting-myself-on-the-back.

I’ve spent a good part of my adult life reading for pleasure and studying the techniques used by writers I admire. I’ve also written copiously on many subjects of interest to me, including several sweated-over, unpublished novels and over a hundred poems (four published).

As someone who has a fairly broad knowledge of Shepherd’s work, I believe I’m an appropriate person to delve into his stories and “edit” them.  I’m the author of the only book about Shepherd in addition to various other published and unpublished essays about his work—including nine published sets of “program notes” accompanying the nine sets of available CDs of his previously unheard audios meant for syndication–but virtually never syndicated.

I also feel that I have a decent sense of what he does in his work—his way of thinking and his “philosophy,” and I feel I’m able to respond to it in appropriate ways when questions arise.

So, as editor I did much more than correct grammar and deal with Ps and Qs and commas. The term “editor” is a loose one in the general reader’s eye, but can have various meanings in the publishing world.

To begin near the beginning, I have a fairly broad overview of Shepherd’s stories—especially his army stories.  I believe I’ve listened to them over the years with some sense of understanding and appreciation (though my memory for subtle differences between his versions of the same tale is unclear).

I have a familiarity/understanding of his style of putting ideas and sentences together, leading to a sense as to when and how to adjust his improvised words into the better arrangement as he would have done in print—resulting in a more accurate and more felicitous way of putting things on the printed page as he did in his printed versions of his radio kid stories, etc.  Frequently, Shepherd spinning an improvised tale on the radio makes a number of missteps that, while breezing past us on the air, become stumbling blocks when encountered on the printed page.

So, just as Shepherd insisted that his stories told on the air could not be simply transcribed for publication, but needed to be edited for the print medium, I have been involved in several tasks in order to put together a book of Shepherd stories. (I’ve previously quoted him when he responded to a comment on the Long John Nebel Show in 1968 that he might have simply transcribed from his radio broadcasts: “Have you ever seen a tape transcribed? Well come on now….’Well, you must have taped that.’  This is the last thing you can do.”)

Nevertheless, I’ve retained as much as possible of various Shepherd-on-the-radio stylistic quirks—my intent has never been to standardize Shep, but, while silently nudging where necessary, as much as possible to keep on the printed page what he says and the feel of his “voice.”

Most simply, I’ve corrected the occasional grammatical error that Shep would have caught and changed for print. Where he inadvertently misplaces a thought within a spoken paragraph and recognizes it, inserting the right idea where he can but can’t rewind a tape on a live broadcast, for clarity, I’ve lightly inserted the word or thought he spoke and clearly wants, into its proper place.

Infrequently but most disconcerting if left in print, are the times he might be distracted by his own thought process and then gets back on track. The most extreme example of this I’ve encountered, in a Shep narrative not part of his army tales, he begins with a first sentence describing an incident.  He cuts to a totally different thought.  He comes back and starts his introductory sentence again with slightly different wording. He diverts again. He comes back and restates his first sentence, again in different wording.  He does this a total of seven times (Yes, fascinated by this, I listened again and counted), and, with the seventh repetition, finally he continues with his narrative.  In print it would stand out on the page as the printed equivalent of a broken record. Reader, I deleted six of those glitches. To a much lesser extent, I’ve done the same with his army stories the few times I’ve encountered this issue.

Another habit Shepherd has when improvising stories on the radio is switching tenses—not infrequently he switches from past to present to past, not just between paragraphs—or sentences—but within single sentences!  Most listeners probably don’t even notice.  The listener who must put all this down on paper to be printed and read could not let this stand—it would drive most readers bananas.  I devised a couple of strategies.  I tried to get a sense of the story in terms of whether it seemed to more likely fit in the past or present tense, and if so, I kept to that tense.  In other instances, there seemed to be a feeling for some sections of a story to be in the past, and other parts, such as dramatic action, where present tense seemed more apt.  I alternated within the story, keeping to the tenses I thought most in keeping with Shepherd’s style.

I believe I’ve only done the minimum that Jean Shepherd would have done with his own work.  Shepherd actually changed and augmented his audio stories when it came time for him to commit them to print publication.  You can be assured that I did not do any such changing or augmenting—I wouldn’t dare!  In fact, I have the impression that Shepherd made changes in his radio stories that make them very specifically written stories. Including language not permitted on the radio back then. (Folks, I did insert one word in one story that I’m sure he wanted to use but couldn’t. More on this to come.)

Maybe being so close to the process myself, I have the feeling that my transcriptions may have more of a feeling of his spoken stories than his own altered versions of stories–at least they do for me. This is by no means a judgement as to which is better, it’s just my feeling about what I’ve done–I can easily hear Shep speaking in my transcriptions. Shep’s previously printed stories, for me, seem much more written.

Of course I didn’t include every army “story.”  I had to make choices. (Remember that less than half of Shepherd’s estimated 5,000 broadcasts have surfaced so far, and there’s no telling how many great stories lay hidden in the muck and mire.) I also found that a few of the existing audios of army material didn’t, for me, come together as real stories but only as less interesting anecdotes or fragments, so these were’t used. Shepherd only published a couple of his army stories in Playboy, and three out of the four of them, for my taste, are not among his best army stories. Besides that, his “Troop Train Ernie” story, not in Playboy, is readily available in his book A Fistful of Fig Newtons under the title “The Marathon Run of Lonesome Ernie, the Arkansas Traveler.” Shep’s Army has the distinction of only containing never-before-published stories.

For me, most fascinating of all, is my recognition that a chronological story of Shepherd’s fictional life in the wartime Signal Corps on the home front existed to be discovered, thought through, and organized into a rough narrative order into divisions I call “Parts.” Part one of the comprehensive story begins with induction and related first days. The following parts move through early Signal Corps schooling in Camp Crowder, Missouri,

welcome camp swampy

(Camp Crowder a la Beetle Bailey)

then into many episodes in Camp Murphy, Florida during his radar experiences,

camp murphy marker(On the edge of the Everglades)

followed by some general army experiences, and then ending with an apt conclusion as he encounters some POWs and then is mustered out at last. I believe that, because novels have more prestige than a batch of short stories, Shepherd referred to his first books of stories as “novels,” but I don’t think they are. However, these army stories as a group do have a sense of progress through time and his experiences in the service—they constitute what I think of as a kind of Shep “army novel.” They come together in this book as a growing-up experience in the army for Shepherd—the fancy word for such growing-up “novels” is “bildungsroman.” That is the sense that I feel comes through in Shep’s Army.