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Home » ARTSY FARTSY » JEAN SHEPHERD Kid stories. Halftime Sousaphone & (107) ARTSY more Table of Contents 3

JEAN SHEPHERD Kid stories. Halftime Sousaphone & (107) ARTSY more Table of Contents 3

Halftime Sousaphone

I think the halftime ceremonies are one of the most truly American folk rituals that we’ve got.  Every country in the Western World plays a version of football, but it’s only America where about three minutes before the gun goes off for the end of the first half you see this great crowd of people gathering down in the end zone.  All these chicks with their bottoms hanging out with the sun shining down on them.  You see the blond hair of these chicks with the short vests with the little sparkly things all over them.  And then the gun goes off –POW! And here they come:  “And now it’s time for the colorful halftime ceremonies!”  Oh man, you talk about folk rituals.  There’s all kinds of overtones and undertones—it’s all there—they go marching down.  “And there she is—the Queen of Homecoming!”  You can see the sun glinting on her braces.  “And there’s the big Chevy dealer from downtown there.  See him?”

I dig these halftime things.  Why?  Because I’m going to tell you this, I’ve got a selfish reason why.  Very selfish.  I am legend.  But not for the reasons you think.  When you see guys walk down the street, do you ever think of what they must represent to other people?  In other times, other places?  Men carry legends around with them like little balloons hanging in the air attached by thin strings to that invisible aura of their life.  And they go walking down the streets of existence.

I am one of the all-time great double B-flat sousaphone players to ever come out of the state of Indiana.  You see, a sousaphone, to begin with, most people call a bass horn.  It’s not a bass horn.  It’s not a tuba.  A sousaphone is a sousaphone and it was created by John Philip Sousa.  The reason he invented this was because he wanted to build a great marching band, the U. S. Army Marching Band, and he wanted a horn like a tuba that could be carried, and so they worked and finally designed the sousaphone, which is a horn that is carried on the shoulder, with the big bell over the top.

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GRAPHIC NOVELS INTRO—

What are they and why?

Will Eisner, inventor of the modern form; Sienkiewicz’s expressionistic Stray Toasters; Sim, &Gerhard, creators of the great Canadian graphic novel in 300 monthly issues, Cerebus (an aardvark).

McKean and his amber masterpieces; Drooker, Massereel, Ward, modern and older black and white wordless wonders; Milt Gross and his wordless He Done Her Wrong; Kalberkamp’s wordless stand-alone, Mea Culpa; Peter Kuper’s stencil work; Chris Ware with his unremittingly sad elegance; Art Spiegelman’s award-winning MausJews as mice, Nazis as cats.

Frank Miller, McKeever, David Mark, Harvey Pekar’s “Out of the Streets of Clevland Comes” American Splendor.

More of the Unexpected: Shatter, the first computer-generated graphic novel; and Beanworld, self-proclaimed “most peculiar comic book experience.”

Not Graphic Novels, But Graphic Short Stories: in several parts.

EC COMICS: Were they comics, what were they, why were nerds addicted?

TALES CALCULATED TO DRIVE YOU MAD. The comic that made you think, observe, and laugh.

THE ARTISTS OF EC COMICS—WALLACE WOOD. Wood is considered by many to be the all-time best comic artist. Science fiction, War, Horror, he did it all, superbly. Meeting him with evidence to prove it.

THE MUSEUM

SYMBOLIC DESIGN—AMNH Classification & Continuity.Nature of exhibit design.

ROSE  Efficient coordinator and simultaneously, a clever, elegant artist.

VIVIAN AND FROGS Getting a frog-o-phobe to accept and paint the entire life cycle of a frog.

MUSEUM LEGERDEMAIN 1 of 2 Ray.M. Believable true tales of exhibits behind and in front of the scenes.

MUSEUM LEGERDEMAIN 2 of 2 Ray.M. More believable tales to make you smile and gasp!

SOUTH AMERICAN HALL Designed with ramps. The intihuatana.11/24/16

PACIFIC HALL AND MARGARET MEAD See the sweaty-handed designer deal with the world-famous celebrity-anthropologist, and, museum director in attendance, see that designer attack with hammer, the museum’s Easter Island head! (see revised/expanded version for book.) 

CAVE ART-Holding original fertility goddesses in the palm of my hand. Yes, I’ve held the real, honest-to-goodness originals in my hands! The “Venus of Lespugue” and more! 

PLANETARIUM & STAR TREK Designing where no exhibits have gone before—Spock’s ear, a tribble, and more.

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